Monday, September 11, 2017

Q and A-Adoption Part 3

First of all, I just want to say...we remember.  To all the people who lost loved ones, to the first responders, to America...this day in history is not forgotten.

I also want to add-Florida, we are praying for you. 


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Happy Monday, Everyone!

When we adopted, I got a ton of questions and decided to just open it up for even more.  A lot of those questions are the same.  If you've missed one, check out Part 1 and Part 2.  Today, I'm answering the last batch of adoption questions.  As you can imagine, I'm trying my best to be an open book in order to help other families thinking about adoption but at the same time there are some personal details that are simply that-personal.  If you e-mailed me and I didn't include your question, it might have just been too personal.  I hope you understand.  :)

And I'm by no means an adoption expert.  I'm just an adopted mom sharing her experiences.


*Do you have a list of agencies you could pass on?

No, if I were you I'd reach out to any friends or family you know who've adopted.  A lot of churches have adoption groups.  I'd reach out within the group to get some recommendations.  You can also search agencies online, call to interview them, and then ask for some references.


*What did you do to get your kids ready to bring Britt home?

We told our kids in March of 2016 and didn't get her until May of 2017.  We talked about Britt constantly, so I think that helped prepare our kiddos.  We all got to a point we were just SO READY to get her.  They were ready!


*Do you know the child's medical history in advance?

I could take this question two ways so I'm going to answer it both ways-just to make sure I cover it all.  :)  If the question is asking, do we know anything about the child's family's medical history then the answer would be every case is different but most will not have that information.  If the question is talking about do you know what special need/medical issues the child will have before you go to China to get them...then the answer is yes.  The way China adoptions work is your agency is constantly on the look out for a perfect match for you.  When they see a kiddo's file they think might be a great match, they grab that child for you.  At that point you will get the file-including any medical information they have on the kiddo.  Then you and your husband can pray, seek an international doctor's consultation, and decide if this kiddo is right for your family.  You have the final say.  At this point you can begin the process of securing the child for your family or letting your agency know this kiddo isn't the right one for you.


*When packing for China, was there anything you're so glad you took?  Any tips or tricks?
I talked to friends who'd traveled before and made list after list after talking to them.  You can see Shay's adoption packing list here.  We used the laundry service in two different cities we visited so I just packed enough clothes to get us through one week.  The first week of clothes I had a baggie for each outfit...underwear, socks, outfit, hair bow, etc.  Then after I washed clothes it got a little tricky but the first week we were CRAZY organized!


*Did the hotels in China have converters for your hair dryer, curling iron, etc.?
Yes, in two of our hotels the hotel supplied a converter for me.  The other hotel I didn't even need one.  I packed a hair dryer even though I thought the hotels might have one.  


*Have your kiddos had any jealousy issues since Britt has been home?
No, I think I instantly moved Bowen from "little kid" to "big kid" status which he has mixed feelings about, but none of my kiddos have shown any jealousy issues.  To be honest, Britt has brought out the sweetest side of all my kiddos.  They're all in love.


*Did the orphanage begin calling her Britt while she was there to get her acquainted with her new name?
No, I'm sure some orphanages do this to prepare the child.  It all depends on the orphanage the kiddos are in.  Ours didn't do that, but to be honest, it was nice for her to have a clean break.  She left behind the name the orphanage used with the orphanage (so to speak?). 

*Will you share the adoption agency you used?  (Definitely the #1 question)
I just don't feel comfortable sharing our agency's information.  There was a time during our China travels where there were three families together who were all with the same agency...one family loved them, one family was super unhappy with them, and one family was indifferent.  Because of that, I just don't feel appropriate sharing knowing that each situation is so unique.  I also want to add that the wait time definitely depends on the amount of other families' turning in paperwork at the same time, the kiddos your agency has access to, and more.  Just because our wait time was rather small, it doesn't mean yours will be too (even with that same agency).  Does that make sense?  I hope you understand my reasoning for keeping our agency information to ourselves.

If you missed any of my China recaps, you can see them here...

And I've shared a few Britt updates since we've been home...

As we were in the middle of our wait I came across a blog that said this, "God is the Father to the Fatherless through us.  And if we are living lives that make sense to non-believers then we are doing something wrong.  Our lives are not supposed to be safe, secure, and comfortable.  When we choose to stop living for Christ, we are choosing to be unmoved by the deafening silence of an orphanage filled with children, we are choosing to allow children to sleep in DCS offices and age out of a system never knowing family, and we are making the world wonder where is the church."  (Ransom for Israel blog)

You guys I read that at my desk and just sobbed.

I know every person isn't meant to adopt, but if God has laid it on your heart, PLEASE step out in faith and act on it.  Britt has been such a blessing in our lives.  I cannot even begin to imagine how our lives would look if we hadn't said yes to the call to adopt.  We could have missed this and I pray that you don't.

XO

9 comments:

Megan @ Letting In The Light Blog said...

Thanks for being an adoption champion! Even though I've only had one in my arms for less than two weeks, I can honestly say that following the call to add to our family thru adoption twice has been the biggest blessing. Adoption is hard, scary, full of unknowns, but worth it! Now if I could just get her off of China time 😉
http://www.lettinginthelightblog.com/

Erika Slaughter said...

Megan!!! I've been following your journey to get Collins and oh my goodness! When you're back on US time, I can't wait to catch up!

Mix and Match Mama said...

I just know you are helping and encouraging so many that have adoption on our their heart.

Sheaffer {Pinterest Told Me To} said...

I love these posts! I wish we knew how many people listened to their calling because of posts like these!!!! Love you, friend! xoxo

Narci said...

Your adoption posts are such great resources! That last quote brought me to tears, too! Xoxo

daniellem02 said...

Megan-- I follow you on Instagram too! Congratulations!! We are planning on adding to our family too through the China program and two fb groups have been amazing--Rate Your China Agency and China Adoption Questions. You have to request to join, and fill out info, but then you can search by agency and it is soooo helpful! Just for anyone reading this considering ; ) You really get a feel for the style of agency, number of partnerships, etc

Amanda @ That Inspired Chick said...

You totally nailed it when you said Britt brings out the sweetest side to your kids. Yesterday when you were holding Britt in the classroom, Nixon hopped up just so he could come over and give Britt a kiss and tickle her a little and then he went and sat back down. It was like he just couldn't help himself. It was so sweet! And I don't blame him one bit!! When she smiles at me, I seriously melt. Love her!!

That Inspired Chick

mandabee said...

i imagine this provides a lot of help to people out there thinking of adoption! Thank you for being open to sharing so much about your journey to Britt!

Carrie Burke said...

This was perfect to read today. I got our call this morning that our profile was accepted in india and we can now be officially matched!! Hoping that will come soon. Praying that our homestudy arrives today so I can file uscis paperwork asap. Thanks for answering these questions.